You may be in a controlling relationship with money and not even know it. It could be that you are controlling it or it could be controlling you. Keep reading to learn what you can do about it so that you can attract more money.
What Does it Mean to Have a Bad Relationship with Money?
Let me tell you about Maria – She is stuck in a controlling and manipulative relationship. She is bringing past traumas into this new relationship and even though the other party has not directly done anything to hurt her, she blames it. Maria has created a story that the only way for it to stick around is by micromanaging and being super frugal.
Are you resonating with any of this? What would you tell Maria if she was your bestie?
I would tell her to treat her partner right if she wants him/her/they to stick around.
The other party in the relationship is MONEY.
What you see here is Maria being in a controlling relationship where she is the controller and the money is being suffocated by Maria’s mistrust and micromanagement – nobody like that.
A bad relationship with money is one where you don’t respect money. This can look like hoarding it, ignoring it, talking trash about it, and even not feeling worthy of it.
Why is it important to have a good relationship with money
Having a good relationship with money will attract more of it. Money is not only a tool, but it is straight-up energy. If you have money under suffocating control, you are restricting its flow of it. Control, extreme frugality, and even ignoring your money all stem from scarcity. If you focus on scarcity you will get more of it. That is why it is important to heal your relationship with money and manage the amount of control you have over it.
How to improve your relationship with money
Explore the Resistance
In order to heal your relationship with money, you have to first uncover the hidden resistance towards it.
This is a very emotional topic so looking at this in a dissociated way. As if you are an outside neutral person looking at YOU going through your current money situation.
This will help you get an objective view of the situation and you are more likely to be honest with yourself.
Ask yourself:
-Why does it feel like I’m being controlled by money?
-Explore what am I resisting and why?
-What do I think will happen if I let go of my control?
-Identify the root fear?
If you are Over-controlling your Money
This may look like being overly frugal and hoarding money. It could be counting pennies and budgeting for every penny in the energy of control/micromanagement/desperation.
Step back even further and become aware of what you could be doing that would cause money to cringe and run the other way. Focus on what you focus on – If you are constantly focusing on scarcity and frugality, you will get more of it. Instead, focus on abundance. Know that the money you spend will come back to you. Know that letting go is part of the process of healing your relationship with money.
Give
In order to receive more money, you must learn how to give. Giving has to be done with the right intentions though. For example, you can give money when purchasing a course that will help you become a better photographer and launch your side hustle. Or you can give to a family member in need with the intention of helping and not expecting anything back. The intention is key.
On top of that, you must trust that the money will be put to good use. When you give with intention, what the other party does with the money is out of your hands.
If Money is Controlling You
This may look like having no idea where your money goes after every paycheck. Become aware of where your money is going and prioritize what is important to you.
Financial literacy is also important here. Learning the basics of managing your money will make you a co-creator in your financial journey. You will be able to make informed decisions on what to do with your money and when. In order to be confident about money, you need some level of competence.
This mindset of co-creation is key because it gives you power. You are no longer leaving anything by chance in this partnership.
Positive Money Thoughts
Stop playing defense and be more proactive with your thoughts about money.
Become the type of person that is energized by the thought of money and that will leads to habits that will help you focus on how to earn more rather than restricting activities meant to keep you small.
5 Reminders for Escaping a Controlling Relationship with Money
- Having a good relationship with money attracts it
- Be a co-creator of your money story
- Money is a tool
- Explore the limiting beliefs you have about your ability to keep money
- Confidence in your money = competence
Closing
Whether you feel that you are being controlled by money or you are holding on too tight – this is a recipe for scarcity. Money is a tool that can be used to get what you want out of life. Like a human relationship, if you want it to stick around, better to know when you are holding on too tight or when it has control over you.
Escape the Controlling relationship
Explore how you are stuck in a controlling relationship with money by signing up for my 90-minute money manifestation 1:1 sessions here. You can also save with a bundle.
Cheers to abundance!
